Have you ever heard statements which are said by many people that you dislike? I have. The above meme is one of them. Why? Because, to me, it indicates a person being too busy to sleep that they neglect themselves. However, that’s not the only reason I dislike it. The other meaning it has, to me, is that I can be so busy doing other things that I’m also “sleeping” on myself. You may feel as if that makes no sense. Give me a minute to explain what I mean.
I sleep on myself…a lot! There are things I’m capable of doing but I don’t because, well, I sleep on the opportunities to do them. Often times, my go to excuse is my family. Once they have decided to move themselves out of the way, the next is my health or that I’ve found another opportunity that I’d rather do instead of trying the original opportunity. Sleeping on myself is another way of saying I allow my insecurities to be the reason why I do not accomplish something I’d really like to do. It can range from not taking up a certain hobby to playing an unwanted game on the television simply because you didn’t think the game you really wanted to play would be interesting to the other people in the room. Basically put, it’s setting aside the desires for something less desirable because one fears the unknown.
I may be busy running errands, managing the household duties, taking care of my family, going to church and continuing to integrate myself into our new community, but I’m neglecting my true desires. I’m not finding new music with which to practice my clarinet. I’m not writing down ways to implement new lifestyle habits about which I’ve been reading. I’m not developing and fostering new friendships. I’m not using my resources to be more creative, which (might I add) is a shame because this is one of the most creative communities for one to live in this southern state. I’m continuously sacrificing my desires for no reasons other than my insecurities.
One of my insecurities is losing people on the way to my self-reclamation. It shouldn’t be one but the truth is, as I look back on my life, there are a great deal of people who I have befriended that are no longer in my life as a friend because when I found of piece of myself, they left. It may have been their purpose to be in my life for only that season but their door is still open because the unanswered question of why is still there. What I do know is that I already have a hard time establishing relationships and I don’t appreciate when after I establish them, I have to give them up right around the time I do something I desire. Makes me not want to trust others or to even entertain the idea of others. If you’ve been following my blog for a while, you already know that I’m not a friend. I have many acquaintances, some which could be considered more “friendly” than others, but I don’t really have friends. If one looked at my life, they’d think I’m lonely. Maybe so, maybe not. All I know is that currently it’s one of my insecurities on which I have to work. I cannot continue to allow my fears to be the reason I give up my dreams. That’s too much for a person to give up in their lifetime.
I’ve posted this meme before but I find it necessary to post it again. In order to stop sleeping on oneself, one should understand the above meme. We have to wake up and create the life we’re meant to live. How does one wake up? Great question! Below are three ways to wake up from sleeping on yourself:
- Take one of your desires and actually pursue it all the way. Don’t just stop after picking the desire. Do what it fully accomplish it. For example, if you enjoy painting, find an art class. If you can’t commit to an art class, there are many sip-n-paint nights where you can paint and sip wine. The point is to move towards accomplishing your dreams without giving yourself another excuse and there is no need to whine about doing something you desire if you have wine.
- Create a list of your dreams and decide which ones are actually worth pursuing. Sometimes we have things in our list of desires that we know we’re just not going to do. We have to be real with ourselves. Are you really going to move to the Himalayas to join the monks like you said you would after college? Are you really going to start coffee/bacon only bar you thought of one night after having breakfast for dinner? Like, what do you really see yourself doing? Not in five years. Not in one year. Right now. If someone gave you the money you needed to do your most desired dream, would you do it if it means you have to accomplish it right now? Would you give up your job, put aside your family, move, do whatever it took to accomplish it? If not, perhaps you should acknowledge it for what it was – a passing fad, an expired dream, a one time wish – and let it move on from your life. A quote I’ve heard before is “your dreams cannot fulfill its place in your life if you already have something in its place”. So create a list and make space for the dreams that you really want to accomplish.
- Surround yourself with like-minded people. While I know this can’t be done all the time, it is a great way to get and keep yourself awake. Having like-minded people in your corner can keep you engaged in your own desires. They can motivate you, keep you accountable and can eventually help you pursue other goals as they come to pass. We all need a team to help us from time to time and one of their functions is to keep you from going to sleep on yourself again.
Now that we have those tips, let’s get out of our personalized “sleep” or, as the meme puts it, energy saving mode and start fulfilling our dreams. We’re worth it!
Until next time, let this post serve as your alarm clock and it’s time to wake up!