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The other day, my family and I were in the car when a certain song (“Don’t”) from an artist named Bryson Tiller came on. The meaning of the song is that it’s based on a guy wanting to step up as the new man to a woman who has not been treated well by her current guy. He’s wanting her to play the song for her guy in hopes that he does one of two things: treat her better or leave her alone altogether.  You can read the lyrics below. *Please note that although some of the words have been edited, viewer discretion is still advised.* 

 

DON’T

Don’t, don’t play with her, don’t be dishonest (Aye)

Still not understandin’ this logic (Aye)

I’m back and I’m better (And I’m better)

I want you bad as ever

Don’t let me just let up

I wanna give you better

Baby, it’s whatever

Somebody gotta step up

Girl, I’m that somebody, so I’m next up

Be damned if I let him catch up

It’s easy to see that you’re fed up

I am on a whole ‘nother level

Girl, he only f****d you over cause you let him

F**k him, girl, I guess he didn’t know any better

Girl, that man didn’t show any effort

Do all I can just to show you you’re special

Certain it’s your love that holds me together

Lately you say he been killin’ the vibe

Gotta be sick of this guy

Pull up, skrr, get in the ride

Left hand is steerin’ the other is grippin’ your thigh

Light up a spliff and get high

Shawty, you deserve what you’ve been missin’

Lookin’ at you I’m thinkin’ he must be trippin’

Play this song for him, tell him, “Just listen”

Don’t

Don’t

Girl, said he keeps on playin’ games

And his lovin’ ain’t the same

I don’t know what to say, but

What a shame

If you were mine you would not get the same

If you were mine you would top everything

Suicide in the drop switchin’ lanes

And that thing so fire, baby, no propane

Got good p***y, girl, can I be frank?

To keep it one-hundred, girl, I ain’t no saint

But he the only reason that I’m feelin’ this way

Givin’ you the world, baby, when you get space

Pen game get me laid, baby, that’s penetrate

Oh baby

Don’t

H-Town got a n***a so throwed

Pour up, we can party some more

Yeah, got this drank in my cup

Got a young n***a feelin’ so throwed

Spit fire in a world so cold

Young money got a n***a feelin’ old

Spit fire in a world so cold

H-Town got me feelin’ so throwed

H-Town got me feelin’ so throwed

Ride paint and we sip ’til we fold

H-Town got me feelin’ so throwed

Spit fire in a world so cold

H-Town got a n***a so throwed

Don’t

To be clear, I dislike this song but funny enough, my husband likes it. His reason for liking it is because he loves that a man is stepping up to be a better man to a woman that he likes yet sees going through a hard time.  Now one would think I should be on board with a song like this but I’m not.  One would think that I’d appreciate a man being ready to infiltrate a woman’s relationship based off of a one-sided conversation to be the next man in her life right after she’s having trouble with her current man. Yet, I don’t like it. Not even in the least and here’s why.

Perhaps I’m too much of a feminist but I believe in the woman’s right to choose if and when a man enters her life and how he enters it.  In this song, that’s ignored completely. He’s telling her what he can do and how she would be if she had him as her man but that’s it. He is encouraging her to give up her guy so that he can come in and treat her better without exactly asking her what she would consider better or what she wanted out of a man period. There is no female advocacy in this song. it’s almost as if he felt that he needed to step up and be the right man for her because she wouldn’t choose a right man for herself. He flat out told her that he messed her over because she let him. As if the man had no free will. As if she gave him permission. As if she opened the door and said, “please go break my heart”. I will not go as far as to say she was disrespected but I will say that as a woman, if a man cannot respect my opinion and thoughts on my own situation, then there is zero need of trying to get me as his woman. In my opinion, long gone are the days where women sit idly by as the man makes every decision for a woman. Some call it being chivalrous. I’m not part of the some.

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As I digress on this particular song, I must admit that it has gotten me to thinking about what has happened to our music?  What has happened to the discussion of love and faithfulness in songs? Why is it all now about drinking, partying, multiple love partners, drugs and money? It’s even seeping over into musical genres that rarely discussed such topics like rock and country.  It has gotten me curious because we all know the statement “sex sells” but is what we’re buying really worth it? Like, what kind of music am I to pass down to my kid from this current year? So far, it’s been church hymnals because I’m not comfortable with other types of music, especially ones with misogynistic undertones.

What say you? Do you agree with me that today’s music has very little listening worth to it? Let me know in the Talk To Me section below. 

Until next time, please know that I’m going back to my little musical safe haven of the 90’s and older.  I will at least know what the person is saying without someone having to decipher the lyrics for me.

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